: Moving out of transition :
I had a wonderful lunch today with the president and my two closest supervisors (Ben and Pam) at my former company - we laughed a lot, and I realized how much I miss the energy being with people after so many months without regular human contact. Even though I don't consider myself a socializer (I'm more of a thinker), it's always nice to be in the company of intelligent, caring friends.
I got some feedback on how I should dress and what I should emphasize at my interviews next week. I also got some great answers to that infamous and inevitable question, "what are your weaknesses?" The glib answer is that I try to take on too much, that I work too hard. Actually, this is true about me - I generally don't say no if a colleague asks for my help, unless I'm in crisis mode with my hair on fire. As I'm sure some of you will concur, the unanimous feedback was that I should wear my black glasses - they said my glasses pull my whole look together. They also suggested that I schedule a second trip two weeks later for follow-up interviews. I'll have to look into that.
As I told them, at the point where I actually move to New York, I will most likely delete this blog and start a new one, a fresh new blog documenting my life in the Big Apple, where I'm just an ordinary girl. Transition is not meant to last forever. Yes, I will be dealing with details of being TG all my life (hormones, surgery, an eventual prostate examination) but it will soon move out of being the dominant issue of my life and more like someone who has leukemia in remission. I will also make the new blog a little more private - it's not going to be listed on those TG blog sites or connected to other TG people's blogs or message boards. So sometime in the next two months, if you are a reader of this blog and want to continue reading, please let me hear from you by email (tsai250@yahoo.com) so I can give you the new blog address. If you're only interested in my life as a transsexual, you probably don't need to bother, since the new blog won't be touching on transition issues. It will be about a girl with a slightly unusual perspective on the world.
I feel that in some ways I am already transitioning out of transition. For example, my 18-month anniversary of starting HRT was last Sunday, and I completely forgot about it. I've been having an increasing amount of trouble remembering to take my t-blocker and progesterone pills (the shots of estrogen every two weeks are a little easier to remember). Even at lunch today, when the waiter was ready to take our order and said "ladies first," Ben leaned over to the president and made note of it. Such small social courtesies have become routine for me (although I still allow myself a thrill at times). Although there is still much to do before I can start my new life in earnest, I already feel a sure sense of self that I've been searching for all my life. Yes, in a way I have traded one "secret" for another (wanting to transition vs. having done it) but the freedom to act and interact as a girl full-time and not pretend to be what I thought a guy should be like is incredibly liberating and fills me with joy.
I probably won't post here until after I return from New York next week, but if you are inclined to do so, please send your good vibes to Manhattan and wish me luck on my interviews. I have five interviews in two days - four PR agencies and a PR recruiting firm, so it's going to be a busy trip.
I got some feedback on how I should dress and what I should emphasize at my interviews next week. I also got some great answers to that infamous and inevitable question, "what are your weaknesses?" The glib answer is that I try to take on too much, that I work too hard. Actually, this is true about me - I generally don't say no if a colleague asks for my help, unless I'm in crisis mode with my hair on fire. As I'm sure some of you will concur, the unanimous feedback was that I should wear my black glasses - they said my glasses pull my whole look together. They also suggested that I schedule a second trip two weeks later for follow-up interviews. I'll have to look into that.
As I told them, at the point where I actually move to New York, I will most likely delete this blog and start a new one, a fresh new blog documenting my life in the Big Apple, where I'm just an ordinary girl. Transition is not meant to last forever. Yes, I will be dealing with details of being TG all my life (hormones, surgery, an eventual prostate examination) but it will soon move out of being the dominant issue of my life and more like someone who has leukemia in remission. I will also make the new blog a little more private - it's not going to be listed on those TG blog sites or connected to other TG people's blogs or message boards. So sometime in the next two months, if you are a reader of this blog and want to continue reading, please let me hear from you by email (tsai250@yahoo.com) so I can give you the new blog address. If you're only interested in my life as a transsexual, you probably don't need to bother, since the new blog won't be touching on transition issues. It will be about a girl with a slightly unusual perspective on the world.
I feel that in some ways I am already transitioning out of transition. For example, my 18-month anniversary of starting HRT was last Sunday, and I completely forgot about it. I've been having an increasing amount of trouble remembering to take my t-blocker and progesterone pills (the shots of estrogen every two weeks are a little easier to remember). Even at lunch today, when the waiter was ready to take our order and said "ladies first," Ben leaned over to the president and made note of it. Such small social courtesies have become routine for me (although I still allow myself a thrill at times). Although there is still much to do before I can start my new life in earnest, I already feel a sure sense of self that I've been searching for all my life. Yes, in a way I have traded one "secret" for another (wanting to transition vs. having done it) but the freedom to act and interact as a girl full-time and not pretend to be what I thought a guy should be like is incredibly liberating and fills me with joy.
I probably won't post here until after I return from New York next week, but if you are inclined to do so, please send your good vibes to Manhattan and wish me luck on my interviews. I have five interviews in two days - four PR agencies and a PR recruiting firm, so it's going to be a busy trip.
